Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Hes a 32 yr old divorced sailor that calls me almost every night drunk begging me to call him big daddy. I think i might need to change my number.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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