My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..