stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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