it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
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