Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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