a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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