I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Dear god my vagina.
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