It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
