fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
