she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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