i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
