Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize