8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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