i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize