dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
