That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
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