WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize