Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize