id be glad to
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
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I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
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