just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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