New low: just hacked my moms facebook
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
