Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize