I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
My bed smells like the plague
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
