I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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