Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Randomize
