Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Randomize
