She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
So squirting runs in the family.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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