I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
i'm really worried about him.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
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Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
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His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
Can you rollerblade?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police