I am in a vortex of obligation.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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