So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Randomize
