I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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