Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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