it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize