At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
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