I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize