Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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