Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Randomize
