I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
What changed your mind?
Being sober
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
