i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
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