Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.