i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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