is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
