i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Randomize
