I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
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i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
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Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
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