Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Floor bacon is actually really good
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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