my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?