Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Randomize
