If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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