yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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