i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Randomize
