We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
